Transform Your Sunday Evening: Feel the Benefits of Reflection

In my “Leverage Strengths and Overcome Weaknesses as a Leader” webinar for Villanova University’s College of Professional Studies, a participant asked a simple question that I considered long after the session was over.

I had mentioned the importance of reflection, and she asked: How do you reflect? It made me stop for a moment, and smile.

Reflection has always been part of my process throughout my life. I’m at my best when I have made the time to reflect – every single day.

Here are my Top #3 ways to get started:

First, while reflecting at any time can be advantageous, there is hands-down a best, most ideal time to reflect: Sunday nights. Not only can it put you in the right frame of mind to start your week, but for those suffering from “Sunday scaries” – the well-known, persistent anxiety the resurfaces each Sunday like clockwork – reflection can help transform and repurpose your evening from anxiety-producing into a calmer experience.

Second, it’s helpful to consider a question or a quote. Unlike meditation, you are not trying to clear your mind; instead, you are trying to ask yourself questions, deep questions. You want honest contemplation with honest responses.

Third, reflection should allow you to feel renewed for the work week ahead. Reflection should reinvigorate you, not deplete you. Ask your “critic” to leave the room. Reflection isn’t a time to criticize yourself – it’s a time to consider how you are actually feeling, how you are actually doing without criticism. You can invite the critic in another time.

Consider starting your reflection this week with Joseph’s Campbell’s idea: “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.” How will you uniquely bring your value and purpose into your work this week? into your relationships?

Reflect on this, and help transform your Sunday into a night you look forward to all week.

Now what? It’s the 6-months-in question you should be asking yourself.

We’re 6 months in. Since September 1st, you’ve heard this repeatedly.

Consider other times you were 6 months in – to a new job, a new project, a new relationship. At 6 months in, you would have a good idea about the future. In a new job or project, you would have a routine. In a new relationship, you would be comfortable. Now, though, being 6 months in doesn’t have to be just about solidifying your routine and being comfortable, as important as both are. It doesn’t have to be just about treading water. It doesn’t have to be just about maintaining work – it can be about something more. It can be about growing – and not just flexing your recently-acquired technology muscles on Zoom, Microsoft Teams, Blackboard Collaborate, Canvas, Skype, Mediasite, Handshake, and Google Docs. (LinkedIn already won your heart and mind, of course.) It can be about asking yourself questions – and not just those structural questions related to your work practices, like how to record and upload videos. It can be about asking the BIG QUESTIONS in your life. Yes, step away now from your much-needed-and relied-upon technology for a moment or two.

When I think about prompting change – in ourselves or in our organizations – COURAGE is the first word that comes to mind. Maya Angelou once said, “Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can’t practice any other virtue consistently.” I agree.

For the we’re-6-months-in-now-what-do-we-do question, I have an answer: Reflect. Have the courage to ask yourself real questions:
• First, how are you doing? What strengths and character virtues are you relying on now more than ever? How does that make you feel? Strong? Depleted? You need to get real and be honest with yourself.
• Second, are you using your greatest strengths and talents every day? If not, what skills and qualities are you using? How can you intentionally incorporate your strengths and talents into your day-to-day life?
• Third, what meaning are you deriving from your roles? Consider personal and professional roles. How can you derive more meaning? Ultimately, and here’s where courage really comes in, has this pandemic opened your eyes to other things – other ways of doing your work or other work itself – that could provide meaning?
• Fourth, and yes, I’ve been leading up to this question: Is this the way you want to spend your precious time?

We’re 6 months in. Now what? It’s time to think about it.

Guest Blogger for Ms. JD: Shake my Hand Confidently: Why Pre-Law Students Need to Learn Professionalism before Law School

See my guest blog post on Ms. JD : Shake My Hand Confidently: Why Pre-Law Students Need to Learn Professionalism before Law School

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